(in the photo: Thaddy, my father, accompanied by the two little devils: me and my cousin Christina)
This blog, these thoughts I constantly share with you exist first and foremost thanks to my parents. We tend to make heroes of our deceased loved ones more often than those still alive. So I will be talking to you about my father and the life lessons he passed on to me and my siblings (as today would be his 69th birthday). Still, I do it all in gratitude to both him and mum.
Sometimes parents/guardians worry a lot about what they will leave behind, for their children. Sometimes, maybe they work too hard to earn money to invest it in their children. One of the strongest aspects my dad invested in me and my siblings, however, was his time. I’m not speaking against working hard to earn money and material benefits for your children or your loved ones. But if it is taking away too much of your time from them, then stop doing it right now. If you think I’m wrong, ask your own children about whether they prefer your time or your cash.
about Faith, and a Meaning in suffering and pain
This is surely the part most of you might not wholly agree with me on. My dad passed his Catholicism to me, true. But more than by this his words, he gave me Faith by his actions. He was a businessman who loved his work and colleagues – and they loved him. When he got sick (heart problems, basically) he got boarded out (google it). Following that, he started to dedicate his time to cooking and keeping the house clean as a baron’s castle, while my mother returned to the working world after many many years.
I can only imagine they were tough times for him and my mum. Yet never, never did I hear them grumble; not an inch of negativity was ever passed on to us their children. To the contrary, I still remember how my dad used to keep this small toy in the kitchen (a Playmobile figurine pig).
‘This pig, son,’ he used to tell me, ‘reminds me of who I was and from which state Jesus Christ saved me. He used my illness for my own good.’
Back then I didn’t understand, but growing up and facing my own life challenges I soon started to realise this ‘pig’ story wasn’t just my dad’s, but also mine. Since early childhood, I was taught that Faith isn’t learning about God nor about getting favours from Him. Faith is a way of looking at life as a blessing, irrelevant of whether it is the good times or the bad time. Faith isn’t understanding God in your life but trusting Him with it.
the Human side
now you might ask me whether the loss still hurts, almost 14 years after his death. Like hell, it hurts! I cry almost every time I hear Pearl Harbour’s soundtrack ‘There you’ll be‘ (by Faith Hill) in the car. It hurts because I would’ve loved if he were there for my wedding, physically. And I needed him so much in my early and mid-twenties when I was still struggling with getting to know myself.
But then again, there’s the good side. I love it, for instance, whenever people tell me I resemble him in my way of thinking or in my social skills. It feels like he is still here, through me. And I know that wherever I am, there he will also be. And do you know what that means? It means he was a successful father. It means he left behind him the best inheritance one could ever ask for: Peace.
Happy birthday, dad. And well done. I sure hope to be as great as you, when/if I become a father.
Thanks for everything! 🙂